My middle name is Alice, and I thought you might like to understand.

Depression is a funny business. And not the ha ha sort. Of course it affects everyone differently, but for me it caused me to shut shop.
I became ill in May and it is only now that I feel able to truly open the door again.
Of course I did all the wrong things, stopped doing all the things that might have helped like exercise and healthy eating.
I also stopped blogging, going out, gardening, house work, cooking… everything except work, because that was all I had the energy for. And when it looked like that might be under threat, that’s when I went to the doctor.
Why do we only go for help when we can’t bear it any more? Why don’t we preempt such things? 
I will in future.
It could have been worse, I could have waited until it all fell apart, but I have been there before and I didn’t fancy it thank you very much.
Anyway, some medication and some CBT counselling and most importantly the prayers of others and my own return to such things gave me a road to travel on and made room for God to bring about my healing.
I have also found some more balance in life. Witness the return of exercise, proper food, and time management (ok I’m still working on those) along with gardening, a new obsession with knitting and weaving, blogging, and proper time each day with Jesus.
And witness the exit of worry. The counselling and the prayers have helped drive it out.
So now you know why I have been away. And if any of this sounds familiar, here are some places to go:

TWLOHA

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2 thoughts on “My middle name is Alice, and I thought you might like to understand.

  1. I am so sorry to learn that you have been suffering with depression, and really pleased for you that you have experienced the deep hopefulness of healing. Please be gentle on yourself and feel that sense of your cherishing by God being woven into your awareness each day. Every blessing.

  2. Oh honey I hate to think of you suffering… I'm at about your June I think at the moment… Managing work and that seems to be keeping me going… Not much else.. Have meds and on the waiting list for Psych Therapist. Love you and think of you always xx

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